I’d gotten caught up in despair, something that’s always slinking just two inches back behind my daily life. I felt unfortunate for my luck, being given what I have, opportunities and circumstances. I pitied myself for pitying others, taking my own life for granted. And not just the life I don’t have, but the one I do have, I pitied myself for. I could be strung up, lashed, throttled out for who I am, but my only real concerns aren’t even that. They’re fleeting, and it didn’t take much to push even those out of my mind, leaving room for everybody else’s. The ideal situation is relative. I’d forgotten that. That bar can be pushed as soon back as forth; I’d just decided to lean to the latter, for reasons I’ve only just slightly explained.
I hope I remember this tomorrow. Every time I come back, it's for longer. That's something, some nature of the world, I can't help but remember.
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